I'm So Mad I Could Spit is the Best Title I Can Come Up With Right Now
Since I'm a big, giant weenie and hate confrontation, when a business makes me angry, I do the only thing I know to do. I write a letter. Yes, I know that when they receive this letter, the manager and employees sit around laughing at me and calling me every name in the book. Truly, I wish I could confront these offenders in person, but when I'm mad I lose the ability to speak in complete, coherent sentences. And I cry, well, blubber really. It's embarrassing. So, the letter has always been my only recourse.
I've written my fair share of letters to businesses in the past who've pissed me off. Target, Olive Garden, and Sears Portrait Studio have all been on the receiving end of a scathing letter, damning the injustice bestowed upon me.
So in lieu of a traditional face to face smackdown, here's the letter I'd like to send to Walgreens after yet another irritating experience with their pharmacy drive-thru.
Dear Manager of Shitty-Ass Walgreens Pharmacy,
F*ck you and all your bitch-ass employees. You've f*cked with me one time too many. Next time you piss me off and refuse my discount prescription card with your lame-ass excuses and then f*ck up my receipt, I'm going to come straight through that plate glass window and whoop your ass. You hear me? I'm not f*cking around.
F*ck you very much,
Jennifer Playgroupie
Your Worst Nightmare
Too much?
Yes, I suspect it is. It doesn't make me seem intelligent, but rather like a Jerry Springer wanna be. Here's what I think I'll send instead. Feel free to offer suggestions to make it sound just "go f*ck yourself" enough without making me sound like I'm T-RASH.
Dear Walgreens Pharmacy Manager,
RE: transaction on Tuesday Morning, August 21, 2007
I am writing this letter to convey my displeasure over this morning's transaction. Every time I come to the drive-through, I'm inconvenienced and treated rudely by your staff. This morning was no different, as your clerk informed me that the Prevacid Discount Card required a new prescription before it could be used. I read the fine print on the card and the paperwork I received from Prevacid and I'm sure that your need for a new prescription is false. However, since I'm not one to argue, I didn't question with the clerk.
I also didn't complain when your clerk then made an error and was not able to print a regular receipt. Instead I got a receipt printed on typing paper that looked like something I could have typed myself at home. Since I pay for prescriptions with my Flexible Spending Account card, I am often asked to provide proof with a receipt that the purchases made were indeed allowable. The receipt you provided will not be sufficient for proof and I'll be forced to reimburse my own FSA, as I'm sure they will deny the charge.
These are just two examples from one experience with your pharmacy. I could list all the times you've inconvenienced me or were rude like when I waited for 45 minutes at the drive-thru window with a screaming newborn or the time your pharmacy failed to fill my mastitis medication eventhough you'd had the prescription for eight hours, but I think these examples are sufficient in conveying my utter and complete dismay. In all of these experiences, not once has anyone ever said "I'm sorry for your inconvenience" or "Thank you so much for your patience."
Since you are the only drive-thru pharmacy in {Shitty Town}, AL, I feel that I'm forced to keep my prescriptions with you. However, I'm through being friendly and not complaining. The next time I'm inconvenienced (and of course there will be a next time, you've already exhibited a pattern), I'm going to complain loudly. I will keep complaining until you've have met my needs.
Please consider training your employees in basic manners that include using words such as "thank you" and "I'm sorry." These simple changes could do a lot for disgruntled customers such as myself.
Thank you,
Jennifer Playgroupie
*******
The letter is....lacking. It needs more "oomph." Help!!
Please? See, I know how to use MY manners.
39 People are even more brilliant:
I hate customer service like this. I would be livid like you. I like your letter but I liked the first one best!!! lol
Hang in there!!!
That sucks.
I'm convinced. Customer Service is dead.
Ugh - I understand the letter writing in lieu of confrontation - I also break down into tears and that REALLY annoys me.
As a pharmacist (at least in a previous life) - I find the way they treat you a horrible reflection on my profession. I know the lure of the drive through given the screaming kids in the car - but that's the problem, they (at the drive through) can't hear the kids screaming while they're in the care. If you took them inside and set them free to detroy/scream/wreak general havoc in the store, maybe they'd be more accommodating...??? or maybe not...
I think it was well written and clearly shows that your upset about the situation.
I hate bad service and it always seems to be at the drive-thru. It's like they think they can get away from it easier.
I understand you wanting to send this letter - I too like nothing more than bashing my frustrations out in a letter to corporate suits. However in this situation my letter would read something like:
Dear Walgreens,
You suck, your service is beyond poor and your staff are incompetent. I've moved my prescriptions to CVS.
Bye!
I wish I could be helpful. I've very non-confrontational though. Sometimes I don't even get up the nerve to write a letter. It comes out too nice, and that's not what I want to do. And like you if I do talk to someone, I end up crying and it makes me made that I did. Good luck.
You have drive-thru pharmacies? That's wacky.
I too am a blubbering-in-person, writing-complaint-letters kinda girl too. Usually though, I'm too chicken shit to send them.
I really liked the first letter, but I think you're right, the second might be more appropriate.
Try sending it through PlanetFeedback.com rather than just sending it directly. They seem to make sure it goes through the right channels to get attention.
I am a big believer in the complaint letter and have used them a few times and I almost always get a call from a "district manager" who's had this come down to him from corporate. I think if you send it directly to the manager it usually goes no where.
I'm also a letter writer. And in at least two cases, my complaints were very well received and I got lots of coupons or free services. I sent an angry letter to the President or CEO of Wal-Mart about the crappy Wal-Marts here in my neck of the woods. (They are nothing like they are in the south, not enough workers and none of them will help you.) In the letter, I used the whole, "I know I don't matter to you, I am just one person and you are a big corporate giant who doesn't care anything about inconvenienced customers, but I have already told everyone in my family about my bad service and will tell all of my friends to tell their friends about how terrible you treated us at this particular Wal-Mart." It worked, we got a call from some very senior person the next morning and he comped us what had been messed up and called the service station (it was an oil change issue) and made them wait on us at our convenience. It was nice. I have no idea if Walgreens higher ups would care, but it did work that one time for me.
I agree with the two commenters right about me -- I think your letter is great but you need to take it higher up the chain or at least threaten to do so if the local loser doesn't respond.
I'm a letter writer, too, even though my husband makes fun of me for it. It gives me time to compose myself and say what I really mean more eloquently than "go fuck yourself, you moronic asshats!" Sometimes the letters get results, sometimes not, but it makes me feel better that at least I tried.
I'm a do-er AND a letter writer. (Yes, people LOOOOVE me!).
FYI - My FSA will accept receipts on regular typing paper. Hope yours will too. I'd suggest you try sending it in but don't draw any attention to it being on typing paper and see what happends.
As for your letter, I would beef it up by finding out what they say are their expectations and benefits of the drive thru pharmacy (we don't have those so I wouldn't know) - check their website or in ads - and tell them that they are not meeting the expectations they put out of themselves.
Good luck! Keep us posted if they give you anything!
Hmmm, I'm not the letter writing type. I'm the confrontational type. GIVE ME MY FRESH MEAT!!! as i grab my boob and slobber and froth at the mouth. It works every time.
Wait. You have a Walgreens Drive thorough for prescriptions?
I wish I lived in Shitty Ass, AL because I would march right down to the Walgreen's and tell them off for you. I love getting in the manager's face and letting him know how unhappy I am with the service.
I would of course use the fabulous line you included about the mastitis. Guilt is good.
If that didn't work, then we'd resort to a letter cc:ed to the district manager of course.
But I'm fiesty that way. The letter is terrific. Just don't forget to cc his boss. Nothing like a threat to job security to get some attention.
Rock on sister!!
Seriously, most people don't have drive-thru pharmacies??? Really? Really??
Maybe I'm just spoiled, then and I should crumple up my letter and throw it away and praise jeebus I at least have the option of a drive-thru!!
Delurking (have I posted before? I forget) for a suggestion: don't threaten to take action next time, take it this time, by writing to the Better Business Bureau and attaching a copy of that letter to a short note to Walgreens - ie, I have been mistreated and underserved one time too many and I have reported your incompetencies to the BBB (see attached). I expect better from a large, supposedly customer-service corporation such as yourselves. I will be moving my business elsewhere and encouraging others to do so as well. (Regardless of whether you actually do!)
PS: your blog rocks. :)
I don't know. I liked the first letter A LOT!!
Actually ( just found your blog and am jumping in with my opinion, do you love me yet?) I would quite simply march into the offending store, hand them cards with your blog address on it and tell them that next time they treat you like crap you will name them and shame them. Also email the head office or whatever they have in the US and send them the link...let them see that the world cares that walgreens sucks. They do suck because they keep emailing ME about their sales and what not and I live in England...WHY?
I used to be the executive director of a nonprofit and all the employees were single women (which really has nothing to do with this comment.) Anyway, we all used the Eckerd's Pharmacy and coined the phrase "Eckerd's Moment", as in , "I need some time alone, I just had an Eckerd's Moment."
I LIKE THE FIRST ONE BEST
ooh, how annoying. I'm an email my complaint person. It usually brings me satisfaction. :)
I like the 2nd letter, but I think I would go into more detail about what they screwed up on. I don't think I've done a drive thru pharmacy, but it's a great idea. Anything where i don't have to drag the kids and myself out is A+ in my book.
Oh my gosh Jennifer! You are too funny! I want you to be my friend, I'm sending you a request right now!
PS: Send them both!
Cyn
cynthiapetersoncommunications.com
LOL! You are funny!
I'm like you, a blubbering mess when I have to confront someone over my displeasure. I usually don't.
I liked your first letter the best! If you think they are just going to laugh it off, I'd send that one!
Go girl!
PS No such thing as drive thru pharmacies in Australia...in fact, I think the only drive thru we have is Maccas...still!
Send them both. I love the first one!
I have written my share of complaint letters, and while I love the first version, I think the second version is very well written.
Please let us know if you get any response.
I have written my share of complaint letters, and while I love the first version, I think the second version is very well written.
Please let us know if you get any response.
i too CRY like a baby when angered. and I too have been fucked by sears portrait studio, had to call their customer service twice.
I say go with the first letter. At the very least it will get their attention...
I wrote a letter to the President of Home Depot when they royally screwed up our kitchen cabinets and got $1,000 back. Go for it!
O-M-Goodness! I loved that first letter. I have to say first that I happen to work for a pharmacy .. and I know first hand that the letter would go on the 'wall of fame' and everyone would get a great laugh. I'd sent it, because at least everyone would get to read it! Maybe just don't sign your real name.
As for the Wal-Mart comment from Pregnantly Plump, I have a perfect solution to the understaffed Wal-Marts in this country. Simply checkout with your cart full of groceries at the jewelry counter like I do. Or go to the automotive counter. Just don't buy Banana's, they don't have a scales! It frazzles them everytime. I also check out 10 times in the "10 items or less" aisle. Yes, I'm a bitch on the good days!
I love this blog. You just make my day!
Tanya
OMG I almost peed in my pants from that last comment about checking out 10 times in the 10 or less aisle!
I thought your letters were great and second the suggestion to send the second one to the Better Business Bureau.
We have CVS drive-thrus here and most of the time, I end up wondering why the hell I didn't just park and go in.
Must be a Walgreens thing. Our Walgreens was the same way. Completely incompetant and rude people working there. I was so happy when the CVS popped up across the street from it. (Bonus: now I don't have to cross the highway to get drugs) CVS has a drive-thru and the employess are helpful and they smile.
Dude, we might as well live in freaking CANADA, where there's no reason to even have customer service. it's a C-O-N-Spiracy, I tell you!
Have you considered changing pharmacies? I would've moved on after the 8 hour wait on a mastitis medication but that's just me! And frankly, I preferred your first letter! :-)
Gotta love the drive thru pharms...I'd send both letters and let them chose which one they like better.
What usually happens when you write these letters? The letters I write generally go out to my moms groups and my book club and movie club... I like to spread the word about crappy service.
I'm bitchy like that.
If you're old enough to have kids you're old enough to know the world isn't perfect. Quit your bitching and take your prescriptions somewhere else. Maybe somewhere where you have to get out of your stinking car and iteract with the employees face to face. What will make a bigger impact...your letter or not giving them any more money?
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