Showing posts with label playing along. Show all posts
Showing posts with label playing along. Show all posts

13 November 2007

Award post

Here's a list of excuses.

1. I've been busy
2. I keep meaning to
3. My dog ate it
4. I've been watching too much Family Guy
5. My brain has slowly been leaking out of my boobs
6. I don't own an IPod
7. My expertise with html is limited
8. I am unable to drink hard liquor without severe consequences
9. Rome wasn't built in a day
10. If you ask me anything I don't know, I'm not going to answer.

This post is a loooooong time coming. To those of you who've bestowed awards upon me, I thank you and beg your forgiveness for being so remiss in my acceptance. Choose from the above list an excuse that will serve as my absolution.

I certainly don't deserve 2 awards from Nap Warden, but I'm definitely appreciative.



I'd like to pass this award onto MamaDB who had some issues adjusting to the time change. Her blog is Out of this World.



For this award, I'm passing it along to the Milk Maid. Her quotes at the end of her posts make me chuckle.

Heidi from Hydes Like Us gave me this:



I shall pass this one along to Mandie at Quintessential Quentin.

I got this one from Magnolia Mama:



I love the comments AndreAnna from Diary of a Diapering Madwoman leaves. She makes me smile.

Kara from You Can't Reason with Crazy thinks this blog kicks [donkey] butt.



This award goes to Miss from Rura and Miss. I love her feistiness.

And finally...VDog and Anglophile Football Fanatic gave me the Egel's Nest Award.



I shall pass this award onto SJSFalter!

19 October 2007

Haiku Ijumaa

Haiku Friday



My baby, my love
There are no words to describe
How much your poo smells

Big girl, eating food!
Applesauce, sweet potatoes
Just makes more laundry

I hope I do well
Being your mommy, your guide
Always, I will love


Ijumaa means Friday in Swahili, or says the all knowing and powerful Internet, just in case you care. Please note, I am indeed wearing one of my brown shirts in the picture. What a surprise.

To play along for Haiku Friday, follow these steps:

1. Write your own haiku on your blog. You can do one or many, all following a theme or just random. What's a haiku, you ask? Click here.

2. Sign the Mister Linky below with your name and the link to your haiku post (the specific post URL, not your generic blog URL). We will delete your link if it doesn't go to a haiku. If you need help with this, contact Jennifer or myself.

3. Pick up a Haiku Friday button to display on the post or in your sidebar by clicking the button above.

05 October 2007

Ask The Binky Bitch and the Panel of Experts



See that sexy vixen in the middle? That's me! Wanna know why I'm on a panel with Ron Jeremy, Mommy Dearest, Maggie Simpson, and Dr. Phil?

Go Here to find out!

22 September 2007

The One Where You All Were Matt Lauer and I Was Britney Spears (But Without the Gum Chewing)

I know, I know. I beg and plead for interview questions, then never bother posting the answers. Of course, I don't think that any of you are sitting at the edge of your seats, or anything, waiting for my answers. This is a ridiculously long post. Feel free to read over several days. Or just skip this post. I would understand [chokes back tears].

Your questions were really terrific, thanks so much for asking them. I've really enjoyed answering.

This first question is from Megan:

Just who do you think you are bossing us around? (in reference to my request for interview questions.)

I'm Jennifer, the Binky Bitch, that's who.

The following questions are from VDog:

Kara also asked this first question...

1. Why do you blog? And when do you find the time to blog? Does sleep win over blogging at some point (it often does with me)?

I wish my answer to why I blog had something to do with an insatiable urge to write and express my creativity. The true answer, though, is because I stay at home all day, rarely going anywhere, so it's my outlet to the rest of the world. I don't have time to blog, but I make time because it's something I've grown to love. Sleep often wins over blogging, although when I first started, I would get up at the crack of dawn to write. Now, I sleep for as long as I can since I'm up at some point most nights with Ella.

2. How has blogging changed you? Has your self-perception changed? (i.e., do you feel more confident as a person? Has your identity as a mom changed at all?)

Since blogging, I've become very outspoken and passionate about women's, specifically Mother's, issues. My self-perception has definitely changed. I was able to find my true self, the person I am in addition to being a Mother. I've said millions of times that blogging saved my sanity, because it truly did. I found a community of people who are just like me. It feels great to fit in somewhere.

3. How does your husband feel about your blogging? Does he read your blog?

Tate has a love/hate relationship with my blog. When I got the gig with MamaPop, he was so proud of me. His interest in my blog grew and he began reading it. Now that I'm no longer writing there, his interest has waned and I think he only occasionally reads me. He gets irritated by the amount of time I spend blogging, but he knows how happy it makes me so he tries to encourage it.

4. Do your friends know about your blog, and if they do, do they read it? How does it make you feel if they know about it, but don't read it? How about your family?

Everyone I know, knows about my blog. Some read it, some don't. Although I started this blog (under another name) in November 2006, I didn't tell people about it until February 2007.

5. What things are personally off-limits for blog material?

I try to never say something about a person on my blog that I wouldn't say to their face. I'm trying (unsuccessfully) to not degrade my poor husband. If I talk about IRL (in real life) friends, I try to keep their identities anonymous, unless they are fellow bloggers.

6. What would your dream playgroup be like? If it were a one-time only affair, how would you do it up? Babysitters? Bartender?? You get the idea.

Dream playgroup?? Hmm. There would be NO CHILDREN in attendance, open bar, thin thighs for all attendees, and the delicious food would be catered and calorie-free. Oh yes, our "playgroup" would also be in Hawaii.

From Phoenix:

1. Do you have siblings? Are they younger or older?

I have a brother who is seven years younger than me.

2. Is two it for you?

At 3 AM when Ella is awake for the 3rd time that night, I'm 100% sure that I'm finished having kids. When it's 1:30 PM and I've somehow managed to get both kids to nap, I think how nice it would be to have 3 kids.

Then I remember my kidney stones and colic and realize that 3 kids would probably send me to a mental institution. I'm not trying to be funny.

3. Last book you read that did not come from the preschool section of the house.

Little Bitty Lies, by Mary Kay Andrews. I don't recommend it. I still haven't read Harry Potter. I know, I'm the only one in the entire world.

4. Who the hell designed your header, cause I need them. I hate my site.

Izzy from Izzymom and Designs by Izzy designed my header. She did an amazing job, I love my header and template so much I want to maaaaarrrrrry it!!!

From Heather:

Why do you hang around friends who are obviously insane?

I wonder the same thing every, damn day. Just kidding. Smooches!

From Tommiea:

Do you miss working?

Yes, I do miss working for the most part. I miss the kids, I miss the adult interaction, I miss the challenge. I do not miss writing IEP's, dealing with lazy teachers (this is not a blanket statement about teachers, just a statement about several teachers I got stuck working with), and car duty. You have no idea how much car duty SUCKS ASS.

More from Kara:

1. Are you in a playgroup in Alabama? How many mom friends do you have IRL?
I was in a playgroup, it sort of imploded on itself. I have quite a few mom friends IRL, like Heather, Megan, Sara, and lots of friends back in Missouri. Many of the people I've met through blogging I feel like are my IRL friends, even if I haven't met them in person.

2. What makes your heart melt with love?

Whenever Carson and Ella interact, I could just cry. Carson is so sweet with his sister and Ella just beams whenever he's close-by. Ah, just thinking about it makes me weepy. Almost makes me want another one. Almost.

3. What makes you so angry you want to spit nails?

People who talk out of their ass really piss me off. Bill Maher comes to mind.

From Mrs. Flinger:

How did you meet your husband?

Tate and I met at my best friend from high school's wedding. He thought I was HAWT. I was.

From Annie:

When and why did you start your blog?

I started my blog in November under the name "What I Meant to Say Was..." In February I changed the name to "Playgroups are No Place For Children." This title came to me in the shower and made me laugh out loud.

I think I answered why above.

From Just my life:

What is the WORST thing you have found out about living in "Backwoods" AL? Or whats the worst thing about "Backwoods", AL?

Backwoods, AL is a fictional place, just for the record. This is the name I gave the town where my husband works. Shitty Town, AL is the name I've given the name of the town where I live.

The worst thing about these towns is their distance from family in Missouri.

From Nicole:

1. Where did you come up with the name of your blog? And, where did "Binky Bitch" come from?

I mentioned that I came up with the name in the shower a few questions back. I think this was around the time that Melissa Summers from Suburban Bliss was on the Today Show discussing drinking at playdates.

You can read the origins of Binky Bitch HERE.

2. If you could have any job in the world, what would it be (besides being a mom)?

I'd be a paid blogger.

Or I'd work in a preschool as an SLP with a caseload of 10 kids with Autism, co-treating kids with the OT and PT, setting up kids' days to promote communication.

3. If you had a whole day to yourself, no one else to bother you, what would your schedule look like?

First, I'd wake up whenever I felt like it, not as the ass-crack of dawn!!! I'd leisurely get ready, take the laptop, and go have lunch at Atlanta Bread Company. I'd come home whenever I felt like it, not because my boobs were getting ready to explode due to being away from my nursing baby!

Actually, I'm at Atlanta Bread Company right now, with the laptop, thinking I should go soon because my chest is growing more and more uncomfortable by the minute.

From Canape:

I would love to hear about college. Where you went, or what you studied, or your social scene.

I went to Southwest Missouri State University, now called Missouri State University. My original major was Elementary Education, but I decided I didn't really like kids. I switched my major to Communication Disorders (Speech-Language Pathology), determined to work with adults when I graduated. I made excellent grades, graduating Magna Cum Laude with my Bachelor's. I was only maybe .02 points away from Summa Cum Laude. I'm still kicking myself for the "B" I got in Poly Sci when I was a freshman. Two years later, I earned my Master's, moved to Knoxville, TN, and started a job working with children in an elementary school.

In college I was in a sorority, I drank alot, and kissed as many boys as I possibly could. I was always the first to pass-out, though, as I always ran out of steam around midnight. To this day, I'm really only friends with one person from the sorority and have lost contact with most of the other girls.

This concludes the longest post in history. If you are still reading, I applaud you. If not, then you'll never know that I called you a QUITTER.

QUITTER, QUITTER.

Smooches to those of you who persevered!!!

15 September 2007

Good Deed

Blue Momma at Life in the Fish Bowl needs our help!

Her Granny is sick. She's got a broken ankle, a staph infection, confined to her wheelchair, has decreased kidney function, and she is barely eating.

Her Granny is depressed and Blue Momma thinks we can all help.

"I want to ask you all a favor. If you have the time and would like to make a nice old lady feel a little better and a little loved, could you send her a card? A postcard? A note? It would mean so much to her and to me. I just don't know what I'll do if she doesn't get better. If you could wish her well and tell her you're thinking about her, tell her you're praying, sending good vibes, talking to the goddess - whatever it is that you do - for her, I would be so grateful."-Blue Momma

Here's where she can receive mail:

St. Vincent's Hospital
Nellie Vincent
810 St. Vincent Drive, Room 529
Birmingham, AL 35205

See how easy it would be to brighten her Granny's day!! Let's see if we can send her at least 100 pieces of mail! More would be better!

14 September 2007

Haiku Viernes

Haiku Friday



Why the screaming, kid?
Dude! I'm not hard of hearing!
Earplugs anyone?

I have been running
Mrs. Flinger's going down!
I will win the bet

Gmail, I love you
Where have you been all my life?
You bring me such joy

******
Play along! You can leave a haiku in the comments or write your own post. GO HERE to sign Mr. Linky and find out more about Haiku!

07 September 2007

Hike Ew Fried Eh?

Haiku Friday



Welcome to another edition of Haiku Friday!!!!!


Put shorts on your head
Everyone is doing it
Wish I thought of it

*********

More poopy diapers
Stinking up my nice, clean house
Diaper Genie blows



Join Christina and me for Haiku Friday! To participate, GO HERE and sign Mr. Linky.

"The rules are simple. Include at least one haiku in a post on a Friday, and link back to this post (you can use the button below if you'd like). Feel free to elaborate on your haiku, or write several haiku to tell a story. Just have fun!

For those who don't know, a haiku is a short poem written in three lines. The first line has five syllables, the second has seven syllables, and the third has five syllables. Easy, right?

Once you've written it, be sure to sign the Mister Linky so others can come find your haiku! And go ahead and use our button, too. Here's the code:

[a href="http://amommystory.blogspot.com/2007/09/haiku-fridays.html"][img src="http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1047/1338959961_a93cf33414_o.jpg" alt="Haiku Friday" height="117" width="150"] [/a]

(Replace these [ ] with these < > to make the button appear.)"

Frumpy Farmer Called, She Wants Her Overalls Back

When I heard of The Parent Bloggers Network's latest Blog Blast, I knew I had to participate. They've teamed up with Harper Collins and issued a challenge to reveal clothes in our closets that we should have donated or trashed YEARS ago.

Just a few weeks ago, I did just that. I cleaned my closet and donated two enormous boxes of high-waisted pants, no-pocket-on-the-butt jeans, shapeless shirts, shirts with horizontal stripes, and many other frumptastic articles of clothing. Please note that I said many and not all. I did save two things. And I'm not at all sure why.



I don't know what I was thinking, either. First, I don't enjoy farming/gardening/landscaping activities enough to warrant TWO pairs of overalls. And second, my tubba-lubba rear-end doesn't stand a chance in Hell of fitting into those clothing anomalies. (Seriously? A one piece outfit? In 2007? Gah!) And last, but most definitely not least, ONLY the 0-5 crowd can pull off this look successfully.


Carson pulled it off much better as a 10-month-old than I ever could have at 32. Actually, I probably didn't pull it off when I first bought them either. Pitiful.

Why did I save these again?

Why don't you reveal your frump-o-rama mommy clothes, too (after you participate in Haiku Friday, OF COURSE)!!! You could win a $250 gift certificate to Coach! Just link PBN and Harper Collins in your post. Be sure to include a picture of your need-to-be-donated clothes.

31 August 2007

High Koo Fry Day

Christina from A Mommy Story had a great idea to designate Fridays as Haiku Day. Since everyone seems to drop off the planet on Fridays, I thought this was a fabulous idea. I mean, why waste my Pulitzer Prize worthy posts on a Friday? Heh.

For those of you unfamiliar with Haiku, it's a seventeen syllable poem, consisting of three lines:


5 syllables
7 syllables
5 syllables

***********

Enjoy these Haiku

If you don't, I will find you

And fart in your face


************


It's that time again

College Football has started

Beer drinking excuse!


************


Grocery Shopping

It's nearly impossible

With a screaming kid

************


I love Alton Brown

His cooking skillz make me hot

Don't tell Tate, m'kay?


************


Haiku Friday, Yeah!

Don't you want to play along?

Oh come on! Join us!



Really! Play along! Either leave a haiku in the comments or post one (or twelve, whatever you want) and let me know and I'll post your link here! Email me at playgroupie (at) gmail (dot) com.

25 August 2007

Alert! Blogger Needs ASSistance!

Dateline: Somewhere in Californ-I-A

Smiling Mom, brilliant mother, teacher, and cook has a dilemma. She needs to know when children start wiping their butts.

People, I need to learn this information, too! Not now, of course, but sometime in the future. I'm on butt-wiping duty for several more years, I fear.

Please go offer your ASSistance to Smiling Mom.

This is your chance to really make a difference in someone's life. (Wipes tears from my eyes.)

18 August 2007

Evidence That I'm a Slug

I have a confession to make.

I've been slacking on my Couch to 5K running program.

Here are the reasons excuses why:

1. It's hotter than hell right now.

2. The heat makes me feel like I'm dying, when I'm only just jogging.

3. I can only run when Tate is home and it's after dinnertime and bath time and bed time. By the time all that is done, it's 8 o'clock. And it's almost dark. It's scary to run in the dark in my neighborhood. There are loose dogs and this...



4. Since it's dark, I can't see my watch and I end up trying to count the time I'm running. It goes something like this...
...15-one thousand, 16-one thousand, 17 one-thousand...(I'll lose my spot in counting because I'm close to death)...20 one-thousand, 42 one-thousand, 43 one-thousand, 60 one-thousand!
I need to figure out a better system here.

5. I'd rather eat Ben and Jerry's Banana Split ice cream.
(Have you tried this ice cream? It may very well be worth a large ass, 'cause seriously, it's spectacular.)

Here's one last confession. When I do run, I actually enjoy it. Shh, don't tell anyone.

05 August 2007

Recap of Running: Day Two, A Tip, and A Plea

Recap of Running: Day two

I f*cking did it. What more do you want from me?

A Tip for those of you doing the Couch to 5K program

Don't drink a margarita, three beers, and eat every last morsel on your overloaded plate of Mexican food the night before you plan to run.

Plea

Tomorrow, I'm starting a gig over at MamaPop. I need your support like your boobies need the support of a good bra.

Please come be my bra tomorrow.

03 August 2007

My Future in T-Shirt Screenprinting

In a move very unlike myself, I actually began my torture running program last night. Something about publishing my plans for my tens of readers (and my
jiggly, cottage cheese ass) really motivated me.

It's only been about twelve hours since I ran, but I'm wondering if it's normal to be very aware of the fact that I have knees. I've always known of their existence, but now it's as if I can feel them all the time. The same goes for my ankles and hips.

Mostly it went well, although several times while running, I felt myself cursing. Since I was listening to music, I wasn't sure if I was saying these words loudly enough for my very religious neighbors to hear or if was was merely muttering them under my gasps for air.

I began worrying that my neighbors could hear me, which actually had the positive effect of making the torture time pass more quickly. It occurred to me that I was probably going to need a T-shirt printed with this message (in case the neighbors were listening to my curse-laden pants)to wear while running...

Front of shirt

I'm not cursing when you hear me yell "JESUS CHRIST"...I'm just loudly asking for His assistance up the hill.

Back of shirt

I am cursing when you hear me yell "Oh F*CK ME, NOT ANOTHER F*CKING HILL"

That should appease my religious neighbors, doncha think!?!

02 August 2007

My Legs and I Thank You For Your Support

I am twelve weeks post partum and I've barely lost any weight. I am still wearing my maternity shorts and jeans. By five weeks post partum with my son, I was already wearing a size that I hadn't worn since college. Please don't roll your eyes at me, I roll my eyes at myself enough as it is.

I naively assumed that the weight would melt away like last time. Unfortunately, the cottage cheese on my behind appears to have been applied with super glue. I've been reading about Swistle's idea to do the Couch to 5K program and I would absolutely like to participate. It's just that I am better at coming up with reasons why I can't do this better than why I should and can do this...

Reasons why I can't...

1. It's 80 million degrees in Lower Alabama, making any outdoor activity really unpleasant.

2. Running in and of itself is really unpleasant.

3. I'm a slug.

4. My fat would jiggle and that would be embarrassing for me and my neighbors.

5. I don't know how I would make time for exercising. It would cut into my precious alone time with my laptop.

6. We have mosquitoes the size of elephants here and they all target me.

7. Exercise makes me soooore and reeeeaaaaalllly whiiiiiiiiny.

8. Did I mention the unpleasantness of the temperature outside?

Reasons why I can...

1. I have legs.

Reasons why I should...

1. My legs are fat, especially the region closest to my ass.

Although the list is short, those are rather compelling reasons as to why I can and should participate in some sort of exercise program. So, I'm going to be joining in the unpleasantness known as running with Swistle. It'll most likely be a modified version. Slugs like me need modifications. And I'm blogging about it as a way to have some sort of accountability.

Beginning today, tomorrow at the latest (well maybe next week at the latest), I'm going to get started on this Couch to 5K program. Wish me and my fat legs luck.

21 June 2007

One Upping Me

I asked you all last week to come up with a better take on my If You Give My Toddler a Blackberry-PDA Edition post last week.

Please go check out these entries!

Jean at Working Momma 24/7 had this hilarious text messaging/high cell phone bill entry!

Jessica at It's My Life Laugh If You Must offered two versions, a toddler version and an adolescent version.

This one is from Beth at Working It Out. It's along the same theme and it's too funny not to share. I swear I'm laughing at the situation, not at them!

Thanks for playing along you all!

If anyone else has one to add, let me know in the comments. I'll update this post and add your entry.